You Have To Learn To Say No To Have A Fulfilling Life
This seems obvious, but far too many people still have difficulty saying no.
Knowing how to say no is an essential part of life. There is a reason why Warren Buffett, one of the greatest investors of all time, often insists that it is fundamental to say no to almost every opportunity that presents itself to you. You should only reserve the yes for opportunities that are truly worth your time and energy.
I have become very aware of the importance of saying no in life and I must admit that I have no trouble, since I was very young, saying no when I don’t want to do something. I have always been able to say no even if it isolated me and went against the current of the group in which I was, for example.
A Lot Of People Can’t Say No
Nevertheless, as time goes by, and I realize that for some people, saying no is an almost insurmountable ordeal!
They do not mean to say no but cannot manage the emotional consequences of this choice. In fact, they end up giving in to pressure and saying yes reluctantly, which prevents them from living a fulfilling life.
I have a colleague at work who is in this situation. He keeps saying yes to everything people ask him to do, even when he really doesn’t want to. No matter how much I point out this behavior and explain to him that he has the right to say no, he can’t change. He is like a psychological prisoner in the yes.
Recently, I took my children to a birthday party, and I saw the same scene happen during an exchange between two mothers. The first one asked the second one for a service that obviously could not be done. The second mother stammered a number of arguments that largely justified the need to refuse for her. Nevertheless, at the insistence of the first mother, she finally said yes.
You Can’t Be Fulfilled In Life Without Learning To Say No
Once the first mother left, I was able to see the second mother fall into a kind of psychological discomfort where she was very upset about having said yes again. Seeing this helpless person not knowing how to say no, I was able to understand one essential thing:
You can’t be fulfilled in life if you can’t say no.
Indeed, by making the yes your answer to everything you are asked for even when you want to say no, you will never be able to do what you really want to do in life.
You will never be in agreement with yourself quite simply. Under these conditions, it is impossible to be fulfilled in life.
You Absolutely Must Learn To Say No
I sincerely hope that my example has made you aware of the importance of being able to say no in life. I even imagine that some of you are already aware of this fundamental truth.
Nevertheless, even if you have become aware of the importance of saying no, you may have been blocked at the time of the act for fear of the reaction of others.
It is true that people around you may react badly if you start taking control of your life and saying no when you were a person who used to say yes until now.
However, you will have to work hard to deal with then learning to say no in order to progress and really blossom in your life.
To help you get through this, I advise you to start by saying no to little things that have no consequences. This will help you gain confidence in yourself and developing your ability to say no. You will have to hold your positions and learn not to overemphasize the reactions of others to your refusals.
Little by little, you will see that the world does not stop turning because you say no. You will gain confidence and then you will be more and more able to book the yes for the real opportunities you want to take.
Knowing How To Say No Will Give More Weight To Your Next Yes
In this way, you will finally be able to flourish in your life thanks to the power of the no that will give you the opportunity to do what you really want to do in your life.
In addition, you will find that the behavior of others towards you will change. Indeed, your yes had no value in their eyes because it was your only answer to everything you were asked in the past.
The fact that your yes is becoming rarer will make it much stronger in the eyes of others. You will thus be taken more and more seriously. This is the second positive effect of being able to say no in addition to having a truly fulfilled life.
It is up to you to act now and start saying no!